Ďalšia zúfalá s názvom \"INNER FIGHT\"

INNER FIGHT

I sat there in front of you, slowly drinking tea.
My body frozen, my conscience in thrill.
On the line between enjoyment and drill,
In silence I stared at thee.

In contrast with my glorious plans,
in the shadows of my feelings,
I was speechless.
I just sat there and saw how time spans.

I may looked calm, but deep in my head,
there was a fight going on.
Weirdness fighting unconfidence,
I felt like my head was about to shred.

My plans were clear, but I have failed.
In fear from you, or myself?
In fear I backed up and fled.
What I wanted became gone and suddenly I was nailed.

This was second time already,
where I wanted to show things.
First one crapped out,
doesn't matter, I've had more to come.
I gathered courage, planned it wide,
I was determined my fears to overcome.

The result shocked me, I was stunned.
I couldn't flatter, I couldn't touch.
All I came up with was just silence.
Suddenly down there, my plans seemed just too much.

Why did it turn out so bad?
Differences between plans and reality made me sad.
I was so determined, nevertheless I couldn't start.
Everything was OK, until the tricky part.
When my mind wanted to go, it stopped down in my heart.

Now I sit here with no idea about what you thougt
when we were sitting face to face
saying nothing, looking at each other.
What impression did you get? At that time me with myself fought.

Will we be just friends, or will we be some more?
Will I even find out some time?
All seems broken for me now,
I just hope you're interested at least as I'm.

Two times planned and two times crapped.
Do I really believe in third time?
Third time lucky, as they say.
In my own thoughts I'm trapped.

In front of you, my feelings are wrapped.
You're constatnly on my mind,
I gather courage, determine myself.
But when I meet you, I cannot let them out.

I don't understand what this is all about.
Why I mess these thigs up
while some others I do without doubt.
Now I need to think some more, now I need to stop.

I am going for one more attempt,
"now or never" kind of one.
I hope you will be cooperative and I will be calm.
If it doesn't work this time,
If I'll feel weird again,
I will end up without you.
Without you, sad and done.

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